Updated: Restarting Coping Skills

I’ve spent time with my former post that listed my coping skills. I went through each one and looked with curiosity about what it actually was, asked if it was helpful, and how I felt during it and afterward.

I noticed there were several I don’t use often and several I don’t do well. But I practice them.

Most of the healthy lifestyle ones I feel better when I do them, experiencing an enhanced quality of life. Except exercising. No matter how long or hard I exercise I feel no endorphins, my depression doesn’t lessen long term, and I don’t lose weight. Why do it? Just cuz it’s healthy? Is that part of my values, or just worshipping at the god of wellness? Hmmm… Health is one of my values. And I like to feel and appear strong. At my weight appearing strong is impossible. So I’m left with feeling strong. Which hardly happens with my current strength training plan. Oh well?? I’m a companion to my mom as she spends time in the pool. Basically my only motivation. Should I continue exercising?

Most of my coping skills seem about lessening pain. A few, such as acceptance without judgement of thoughts and emotions, defusing from unhelpful thoughts, and riding the wave of emotion, send me through pain to the other side. So in a way they lessen pain, yet it’s through pain, not avoiding it. Only the daily breathing meditation seems unhelpful. I’m bad at it even after years of practicing. Most people are, a small comfort. It keeps me company as I fall asleep, which the tv could do… I could do a shorter regular meditation at another time. I find those helpful at church. I think I’ll try something else with that one.

So I guess I’ll keep going with all but one coping skill. I’ll tough out the exercise since it keeps my mom company, and a it’s a good time to talk if needed. Theoretically I enjoy the water. I’m not right now. Probably the depression’s anhedonia. And I’m bored easily by it. I’ll change the breathing meditation at bedtime to a regular meditation at another time, and I’ll use the tv as company while I fall asleep.

At least the others I can do more consciously now, knowing they help. On with it!

3 responses to “Updated: Restarting Coping Skills

  1. Love that you are doing the exercise – for you and for your mom. There one thing I really need to do.

  2. Jody Scheibelhut

    VICTORY FROM 23YEARS SHIZOPHRENIA

    To everyone of you reading this, I pray to God you find breakthrough someday like I did. It’s not longer news that the stigma and discrimination attached to having a mental illness is harder to cope with than the illness itself. Yes, when I had Schizophrenia for 23years, there is never a time I was perceived as being a gentle caring person. I developed schizophrenia so early and the changes were difficult to measure. Horrible Voices, mood swings and delusions and hallucinations play out their effect on me so constantly that they became part of the essence of who I am. I felt something I could not publicly air, it’s nothing anyway; we all have overt or latent prejudices. I spent so much time in and out of psychiatric wards. It was not easy I must confess. I can’t think of a time when I wasn’t plagued with hallucinations, delusions, and paranoia. At times, I feel like the operator in my brain just doesn’t get the message to the right people. It can be very confusing to have to deal with different people in my head. When I become fragmented in my thinking, I start to have my worst problems. I was hospitalized because of this illness many times, sometimes for as long as 3 to 5 months. I began wearing the same clothes each day and seldom bathed. I remember telling my colleagues at my work place that the world is coming to an end; we should take some months off so we can bring it back. Any contribution they have, it should be in writing because there are cameras everywhere. It was funny how no other person knows this except me, yet no one seems to look at things from my point. I was in this lake for years; I thought I was never going to live happy again because I scared almost everyone close to me away. To surmount the whole story, I came across a testimony of someone who had similar symptoms, she understood so well that she made me find reasons to get rid of it by using Herbal medicine, she also promise to refund my money if it doesn’t work. Surprisingly, the amount I was charged isn’t half the money I have spent on drugs most especially, Clozaril which I was told never to take a day off without. I placed my order for HIPPOSSIMA, from my finding that is the name of the Herbal medicine. It was a miracle how the symptoms drastically reduced just after 5weeks of use. Today, my schizophrenic story is now history. For inquiries, you can reach the doctor via: gregoryalhodgson@gmail.com. Or visit: curefromschizophrenia.blogspot.com. I made it thru and so can you! Though it is not easy, but it’s worth fighting for.

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