I think I’m feeling depressed. I know I’m anxious, and have been taking prn’s to combat it. The racing thoughts I was getting were part of the anxiety of attending so many events with people I don’t know. But depression? I started feeling desperate to make the pain stop and thinking about suicide. I really hope this is a blip, and I’ll go back to feeling stable. It’s possible that the anxiety brought on the feelings of desperation and then the suicidal thoughts. That happened quite a lot when I was hospitalized regularly.
I was going to blog about acceptance of the stability I find myself in, and observing what it is like and what it has to teach me. But here I am. Destabilized for now. I hope it’s a short time. At least I know what to look for as far as taking care of myself.