Three days off have helped me stabilize again. The main reason? Keeping to the schedule that I’ve been living since Christmas. Something to rely upon when everything else seems out of control. So, all the advice from bipolar bloggers, NAMI, professionals, etc. is true. Those with bipolar need to live according to a set schedule. I believed it before. Now I know it. Schedule, schedule, schedule. Live a schedule to stabilize your life. Might work for others too, but absolutely crucial for those with bipolar.
Another reason for feeling a bit more stabilized is that I kept my expectations very low this weekend. Not until today did I expect to get anything done. And even then, I focused only on laundry. And I’m giving myself lots of credit for the things I did do over the weekend – pick up prescriptions and milk, laundry, quick swipe of bathroom, load and unload dishwasher. That’s a lot!
Now, I’m hoping that my schedule will help me through this week where my work schedule is all over the place. I work 5 days instead of 4, but each day fewer hours. Should make it easier. The first four weeks of work my schedule is irregular, which does not help me get used to working or stick to a schedule as I need to.
I’m trying not to worry about this upcoming week by taking just one day at a time, staying in the moment, remembering that I like my job and the people there, and that I just have to get used to it. I’ve been through this before, and I can again. I just really don’t look forward to feeling/being destabilized. So often that feeling has led to hospitalization because I can’t guarantee my safety. And I hate being in that place mentally! Bipolar sucks.